Hard to Believe...

As I get older - one thing always remains consistent...the year flies by MUCH faster. I seriously feel like it was just the other day that I was buying my house when in reality it was January. "Busy Season" was just the other day as well and here I am looking at it in the face again.  I do however hope that April 15th gets here extremely fast this year - -  after that the year has my permission to slow down to a normal speed such as the speed it was when I was a kid. It always felt like SOOO long before my next birthday would happen....SOOO long before Christmas would get here again.

I wonder what makes time go by so slow when we are little. I kept myself busy exploring the world outside of the house throughout the year; playing with friends and building forts in the back pasture. I rode my bike constantly down the street and back.  I kept my mind occupied on thoughts about all of the new experiences and explorations I was going on.  True - maybe they aren't thoughts of money issues and relationship issues like we have as adults - but still many thoughts.  Oh to be a child once again.

Here's to 2011. It is hard to believe that 2010 passed by so fast...but at the end of every year we get a chance to look forward and have hope for a better year to come.

This year:

• I want to pay off my car loan and own my car completely.
• I want to find something to love about everyone I come in contact with.
• I want to pass the CPA exam.
• I want to have more intimate dinners with my boyfriend.
• I want to take my dog out for more walks - he deserves them.
• I want to explain my passions in a more coherent way to myself and others.
• I want to determine my personal theme song and dance around crazy to it at least once a week.
• I want to change someone's life for the better.

What do you want to do in 2011? Remember that faith can make the seemingly impossible - possible!

Every time I read this I get chills...so I thought I'd share :)

Never Say it is not God - Hafiz

I taste what you taste. I know the kind of lyrics
your Soul most likes. I know which sounds will become
Resplendent in your mind and bring such pleasure
Your feet will jump and whirl.

When anything touches or enters your body
Never say it is not God, for He is
Just trying to get close.

I have no use for divine patience -- my lips are always
Burning and everywhere. I am running from every corner
Of this world and sky wanting to kiss you;

I am every particle of dust and wheat -- you and I
Are ground from His Own Body. I am rioting at your door;
I am spinning in midair like golden falling leaves
Trying to win your glance.

I am sweetly rolling against your walls and your shores

All night, even though you are asleep. I am singing from
The mouths of animals and birds honoring our
Beloved's promise and need: to let
you know the Truth.


My dear, when anything touches or enters your body
Never say it is not God, for He and I are
Just trying to get close to you.

God and I are rushing
From every corner of existence, needing to say,
"We are yours."

Posts from the past....

So many years ago, I used to have a xanga. I still have it apparently and every 3 or so months something triggers me to wonder if I wrote about the happenings of my life at such and such time so I go to my xanga and see. I found this post just tonight and I remember every word of it and the feeling I put into it. I'm not a great writer...but I remember what this blog actually "felt".

"I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long.
If we're in each others dreams, we can be together all the time."

So Calvin and Hobbs is DEEP shit man. This quote -- has been eating away at me lately. It's how I feel...it's how I think...it's me in a quote. You know how happy you make me? Probably not...but you do know a little because I know I've told you more than I should. I tend to crack little holes from the wall around my heart to let things sneak through...while the wall is still there -- the holes allow you to see it without necessarily giving it to you.

    I only spoke the truth to you because I wanted you to know -- I have no reason to hide it.

"Love like you've never been hurt..."

Umm...YEA RIGHT. I want people to quit using this quote and actually TELL ME how to do it. Is there a secret? Will you teach me the secret handshake to get into the club?


I am writing this down because I remember it....

"...because the more you hold onto...the more you will have to let go eventually."
Have I mentioned how f'ed up the truth is lately? GARR.  When this came out of my mouth last night it was shocking how much it hurt. I love him but have to let him go.       

Arizona Breast Cancer 3 Day - Day 1, 2, and 3

DAY 1

I was nervous this year. I didn't train like I had the first year I did it (back in 2008) and I am only 7 months out of knee surgery (ACL replacement and meniscus repair). I surprisingly fit my clothes, sleeping bag, and pillow into my pack Thursday night and dropped it off first thing Friday morning and trailer "B". Then I made the walk to the opening ceremonies. I was VERY happy to see they had coffee and since I was there early enough (I got there at 6am) I didn't have to wait in line to get it! I then started looking for my teammates. Here we are in front of the "Opening Ceremonies" poster!

From there we moved into the "holding area" to watch the opening ceremonies and get ready to begin the long 60 mile journey. I always hold up fairly well (because frankly...the ceremony is a bit cheesy) but tears DO fill my eyes when the flags come out and the survivor circle is formed.

The small white flags in the middle have the names of those we remember who have lost their lives to breast cancer...we walk in remembrance of them but also in celebration of those who are still with us - the very heart of the surviver circle!

Then our journey began:

We stretched along the way: (Photo of Cindy and John - two teammates from the Ta-Ta Sisterhood!)

And we finished! I only did 10 miles the first day as I was unsure about how my knee would hold up - I was feeling pretty good here:

I then visited the Remembrance tent. You see the photos hanging up around the tent are those walkers who walked with us that have since lost their battle with breast cancer. It is very emotional in this tent and the environment is very peaceful. You take away their strength as you look at their pictures and remember those who you walk for - even though you did not know them. This year one photo stopped me in my tracks. There was a young woman who walked in the San Diego walk - passed away at the age of 29! I am only 25 and it is hard to imagine what she had gone through in her fight. I don't know her story - but her photo told me so much!

 There was also lines of the remembrance tents from each of the events prior to the Phoenix 3 Day. They were all signed by walkers in remembrance of those they love. Many "I love you and miss you Mom"'s and "You are not forgotten"s. Taking the time to walk and read some of these messages really gives you more strength to go out and walk another million miles so one day our walking will be in celebration that the cure has been found and breast cancer is no more than a moment in our history.

After walking the first day - you must set up your tent. I didn't bring decorations as I am not a very creative person...I do good to dress myself! lol One of our teammates decorated her tent though and it was a cute little puppy!!!

Sometime while I was eating dinner - the last walker arrived into camp. We all get to cheer them on and they get to raise the flag "One day closer to the end of breast cancer!"

Around 9pm it is quiet time and I headed to bed (and believe me...it sounds early but after walking so much and having such an emotional first day....you are ready for it!) I FROZE the first night as it got into the 40's...however, I couldn't help but think how easy sleeping in the cold was compared to what some folks go through when they are dealing with their medical issues. I did it happily the second night.

That's all for now. I will try to post Day 2 and Day 3 soon....I need to go to bed so I will wake up for work in the morning!

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DAY 2

The morning of the second day you realize that you walked a lot the first day ...how do you JUST realize that? Well - you try to get up out of your tent and can barely move you are so sore and stiff...haha...that's how. I had slept in my clothes for the following day the night before - mostly so they'd be somewhat warm and also so I wouldn't have to strip down in the chill of the morning to change clothes. I hopped up and washed my face and headed to breakfast where the early, cheery people were. I am NOT a morning person - sorry :) It still was nice seeing so many people excited about another 20 miles of memories and personal accomplishments. 

One thing you look forward to the most on your journey are 1) Cheer Stations and 2) Walker Stalkers. There are many along the route - usually 2 cheer stations a day and TONS of walker stalkers who you get to know throughout the weekend because you see them at least 2 - 4 times throughout your 20 mile days.

 These folks were dressed up different EVERY DAY to come out and cheer us on :-)

And of course the TA TA SISTERHOOD'S favorite Walker Stalkers - Beckie, Lizzy, and Monkey :-) They are also teammates of mine!

At Pit Stop number 2 on day 2 - my two favorite guys came to cheer me on! 

Jasper even put on his new t-shirt I bought him from the 3 Day store!

Another fun part of the walking is coming to each "Pit Stop" and seeing what the theme is. Each one has it's own theme. I didn't get a picture of it on my camera - but there was a Wonderland pitstop this year and it was SOOO cute and fun (and they had candy). 

Lunch is always a time to air out the feet and stretch and eat/refuel for the second half of the day. I decided that I should end after lunch and take the SAG bus (which gets you some cool buttons the "all-the-way" walkers don't get by the way) back to camp. Below is a picture of the lunch stop and also a picture of the bus getting ready to head back to camp from lunch! Yee haw!

While I'm on the topic of "buses" - there are also "Sweeper Vans" along the route. Their jobs are to cheer on the walkers, honk at the walkers, yell "WOO HOO" at the walkers, etc. Additionally, if a walker throws his or her arms up over her head in an "X" when a sweeper van is passing - they pull over and DRIVE you to the next pit stop where you can get medical attention or possibly take a SAG bus back to the camp. They rock and take good care of us walkers all weekend.

I don't know what you would call them - but I call them "BIKER GUYS" and they also rock - like everything else about this weekend (I know "ROCK" is my only adjective I have been using but it is true hehe). These guys are crazy fun - they sometimes play music and dance and encourage us to dance even though we hate ourselves for making our bodies walk sooooo much in one day. They also deal with traffic so we don't get run over when not paying attention to traffic because we are more interested in our conversations with others on the trail or with the blisters on our feet or....just everything else except traffic. 

DAY 2 (of walking) DONE!

Ok - now back to camp. Some often wonder "Hmmm - they are walking 60 miles in 3 days and they sleep in tents at night and um....eww porta potties. How do these ladies and gents stay 'clean'?" Well the answer my friends is "PORTA KLEEN"! Portable showers! I actually LOVE portable showers. They are the BEST ending to a day of walking out in the sun. You just hop right up in this trailer (as you can see below) and find an empty stall and enjoy hot water showers. They really spoil us beyond belief on this walk (now if only they can figure out a way to make portable toilets as amazing as portable showers...doubt it but that's a new goal).

 For dinner on night 2 we got steak and I obviously enjoyed mine! (see picture below....I'm such a strange person)

DAY 2 - OVER! Another day closer to the end of breast cancer!

 After dinner there was a "Camp Show" and an evening which ended with a DANCE PARTY! The picture below shows all of the guys who had to get up on stage and dance for all of us women! I loved it!

 Then it is off to our sea of pink tents for the night - again 9pm never comes soon enough! This second night they issued us all mylar blankets to help keep warm. They were loud but definitely were magical with the amount of heat it kept in my sleeping bag for me!

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DAY 3

Day 3 was the hardest for me this year. It was only 15 miles as there were extra miles tacked on to the first 2 days - so I decided to do the whole thing! It was also an emotional day because you knew your journey would be over - you were happy it was going to be over - you were sad it was going to be over - you were overwhelmed because you had made it so far and in the name of something you are so passionate about....I could go on and on about the emotional wear-you-outs. I'm just going to post about this day with picture comments. Enjoy:

Two of my teammates and I after riding the bus to the beginning of Day 3. We started at the foot of Camelback mountain and ended at the Arizona State Fair Grounds - now that's a long walk :) 

First thing we got to see in the morning was the THUNDER DOWN UNDER - and it brightened my morning....not so sure John appreciated it as much and Cindy and I - but it was nice.

I'm a super hero!

Just showing off my pack - I was carrying my second pair of shoes the third day in honor of those of my friends who have lost loved ones to breast cancer and therefore couldn't walk with us. I also donated those shoes at the very end as they were worn out from all of the walking.

Nothing is sweeter than going to get your Victory shirt! :) 

The last walker is coming in for the day - everyone surrounds them and loves on them and cheers for them and we are ready to CELEBRATE!

THREE DAYS - 60 MILES DOWN.

Closing Ceremonies

We honor the survivors as they walk into the middle for closing ceremonies. We walk for them! And we love them!

Closing Ceremony - Survivor's Circle - we WILL conquer this disease.

Survivor dance party :-) I loved it and it was very inspiring to see all of the strong men and women who walked the 60 miles with us celebrating their personal victories. They are far stronger than I could ever be and I love them for it!

100 things that make me happy:

1. Really good hugs. 
2. Meeting people who I click with. 
3. Family. 
4. Romantic movies. 
5. Music. 
6. Naps in the spring with a nice breeze coming in the window. 
7. Hearing a very young kid say something adorable but wrong. 
8. Holding hands with someone you really like. 
9. Smiling about something in your head that no one else hears. 
10. Unexpected emails from old friends.
11. Sending “surprise” cards to someone.
12. Getting to the destination after driving FOREVER.
13. The view from on top of a mountain.
14. Being at Camp Ziyoca with people you will never forget.
15. People telling you that you can reach your goals without knowing you were doubting yourself.
16. Seeing the stars and realizing how small you really are.
17. Head massages.
18. Back massages.
19. Fuzzy socks.
20. Hot chocolate and smores.
21. Being held by someone you like.
22. Volleyball – playing and watching!‎23. Good quotes.
24. Laughing like a crazy person until I can’t breathe and I am crying.
25. Reading a good horoscope.
26. Actually getting an intelligent fortune when I crack open my fortune cookie.
27. Winning something on E-Bay for CHEAP!
28. The scene in “Liar, Liar” where he can’t lie about the color of the pen.
29. Playing Imaginiff.
30. The movie Rent.
31. Guys who have enjoyable rear ends.
32. Singing campfire songs.
33. Shrek and Shrek 2
34. The way cartoons from when you were younger make you feel when you see them.‎35. Holding an extremely small baby.
36. Finding shapes in clouds.
37. The different colors in a sunset.
38. The sunrise over the mountains in Phoenix.
39. A really good grilled cheese with honey-buttered bread.
40. Sleeping in as long as I want to.
41. Sitting at a coffee shop and knowing the other patrons.
42. When little kids come up to you and smile even if they don’t know you.
43. Blueberry muffins with the crumbles on top.
44. Being with another “adult” and watching a “kid” movie.
45. Laying on your back beside a good friend and just talking.
46. Getting to know someone it seems you could have known for years.
47. Macaroni and Cheese – it’s just so simplistic yet splendid
48. A random text from that one person you had hoped to hear from.
49. Making someone else smile by sending them a card in the mail.
50. That shy/good feeling you get after making eye contact for a couple seconds with someone.

That's all for now...I need 50 more...I will complete this...promise.


CONTINUED:


51. Hanging out with Jasper and being lazy
52. When Sherwey thinks I'm sleeping and kisses my forhead
53. Hanging out with the band after the concert because they are "good friends"
54. Catching a glimpse of a child in awe of the world
55. Random facebook messages from long lost friends
56. Driving in my VW Beetle and seeing young kids "Slug Bug" each other
57. Seeing Jasper's excitement when I mention the work "Park"
58. Taking Jasper to daycare and realizing it is his favorite place EVER
59. When Sherwey calls me a nerd with his cute little smirk 
60. Watching Modern Family


UPDATE (11.18.10):


61. Dancing crazy while driving down the street.
62. Brad Paisley in concert :-)
63. Finishing the last page of a good book.
64. Noticing a positive change in a friend's life.
65. Watching silly youtube videos

Passion

Lately I have been thinking a lot about "passion". What are my passions? Can a person have too many or too little passions? What if you go through life never realizing what your true passions are?

I have found myself stumbling from one activity to another - loving the learning and experiences I gather from each however, not truly finding a passion in any of it. I feel a lot of times, the activities I engage in are out of responsibility and duty. Whether it be the duty I have in my profession to network and expand my contacts to help grow the Company to the duty I have to staying in touch with friends and family and making sure they know how life is going and meeting up with them every now and then. Don't get me wrong - I love doing most of the things I do...it just seems like I lack something in it all.

Recently I have started a list in my head of the major events that have happened over the course of my life. This is a process one of my life mentors has challenged me to do. Obviously, birth is the first event (even though I can't remember it). It sparked every other occurrence in my life. As I went along, the things that started sticking out the most have been my experiences away. The times that molded me the most from junior high and high school were at church camp in New Mexico. I remember waiting all year long for that ONE week a year where I got to see these folks that were so important to the development in my life. Whether it be friends who lived in cities that were not close to me so we only got to see each other this one time a year - to the teachers and counselors who probably still to this day don't realize how much I looked up to them and watched them so closely and tried to mimic their lives. I loved camps - and now I have been the camp director for 2 years (will be again next summer) and I love it. I would say camp is one of my passions because I believe in the change it has for the better in the kids' lives.

In college there were two major experiences away from the campus that shaped me. The first was my time spent in Chattanooga, TN offering ministry in the downtown area for the month of January. I loved learning how to relate to folks that weren't like me. Learning that folks have much harder lives than me was an eye opener. You always read stories, but to hear them first hand from children - about their parents who are out on the streets...doing "street things" - leaving their children at the homes to fend for themselves...small children learning adult things as they struggle to raise their younger siblings. Searching through garbage cans to find food to feed them...hiding under mattresses when gun shots were fired through the windows...etc. Stories that would make anyone shiver. I grew so much in such a short time. I learned what exactly showing Christ's love to someone truly meant. I learned a little bit about judging people without knowing them. I learned how to see through someone else's eyes and learned that maybe the things you see people do is not who they really are...it is survival. Through this I found that I have a passion for learning to love people. Learning to love no matter how rough the edges may be but working to get past what you may see on the outside and truly seeing how I believe Christ sees his children.

The second experience in college was my trip to Peru. I found out that I have a passion for culture and being immersed in it. I was out of my comfort zone probably 90% of the trip. I could barely remember the Spanish I was taught in high school and the culture there is so different. Still I managed to make friends and I managed to learn a lot about their culture. I would LOVE to go back one day and spend time living with a family there. I think my best memory from the whole trip is when we traveled into the mountains to help build chimney stoves with the folks of the village. They spoke Quechua but also knew Spanish and some English. I had just finished helping a family build their stove and the young boy in the family was showing me how to count. He would count in Quechua first and then in Spanish and then in English. I was amazed at someone so young knowing three languages like that! I wished at that moment that I would have studied other languages more and spent my life learning like many in other countries. I would go back to Peru any chance I got and live among the people there. They were all very happy even though as I walked through the villages, I knew instantly that I was in a third world country. I felt horrible bargaining down at the markets for things that were already underpriced. I of course was a poor college student at the time and couldn't afford even underpriced things - but still realized that this is how these folks made their living! It was just incredible! So I believe that traveling and learning about other cultures and the people in them is also a passion of mine.

I have recently discovered a new passion locally. I have spoken about the program before - but Open Table is awesome.  I have been involved since June and have been meeting with our Open Table family weekly. Each week it amazes me. On their website they state what they are:  Open Table is a growing collaboration of people from faith communities, state and local government, business, education and non-profits who are united in a shared purpose of restoring families in poverty to wholeness and full participation in our communities. What gets me every week is that we truly are making a difference in our family's life. The biggest thing I see is that every person on my table yearns to be a support system for this family. We aren't there to  gain something for ourselves - we are there to give ourselves to someone else. I often wonder what it would be like to be on the other side. To be the family in poverty learning to trust the folks there around the table that are helping you. What goes through their minds? Last night we had run their budget and they didn't have enough for gas the next week so everyone through in a little money without hesitation. If I were them - I wouldn't believe my eyes. Most people in our lives wouldn't do the same for us - they probably wouldn't even know we had these struggles. I don't know where I'm going with this - but I do know I am finding my passion in this. I am finding that I want to be involved in making the world a little better for my neighbors. I am finding that my mindset about those living out on the streets and on the side of the road are changing. I find that when I pass someone on the street - I make less and less assumptions about them and instead love them and hope that one day they can find someone to help support them and believe in them enough to get out of their situation. I know that folks make mistakes now that ultimately lead to their downfall - but that doesn't mean they can't learn to change. Anyway - that's all about that I suppose. I keep rambling without getting my true point across. heh

Even with all of these things I listed above - I often feel like I lack passion. I want to be doing what I am passionate about yet don't feel it is realistic. My ultimate goal is to figure out how I can live my life here in Arizona with genuine passion. I want to find the activities that feed those passions and be able to have the time to do them. I don't know exactly what that will look like - but I will keep searching and maybe one day it will find me.

I've hit that age...

Twenty five seems to be the magical age...all of my friends are now getting engaged and married. It seems there isn't a week that goes by where I don't get a text from a friend saying their engaged or a Facebook news feed that states so-and-so and so-and-so have changed their relationship status to engaged.

I don't mind it - I think what truly bothers me is that I don't understand it. I have been dating the same amazing boy since November 2007 and here we are at the almost 3 year mark and I still am unsure about how to go about taking that final leap of faith and committing to one person for the rest of my life. It's definitely not an issue of me loving him or believing that we wouldn't have an amazing life together. I truly believe we work well together. I also know we have seen each others strange little quirks and still seem to enjoy each other. He has taken care of me through sickness and kept me out of trouble numerous times. Hardly a day goes by where we don't see each other and if we won't be seeing each other we still seem to have something to say to the other so chat is utilized. We even practically have a child together...yes, Jasper is a puppy...however, if you saw the joint effort it takes to raise him you'd know what I'm talking about! If I need to study or have an evening meeting, Jasper's "daddy" picks him up and takes him home for the night. Jasper has toys at both my house and his daddy's house as well as food and water bowls as well as treats. He practically lives the life of a child who travels between parent's houses to spend time (joint custody). Back to the point - I don't understand.

Thinking back on the two most recent engagements announced to me: both are friends from church out here. One became a close friend right before he started dating the girl in October/November time frame last year (2009). The other is a young lady who became an instant friend from the young adult group. She and her beau started dating sometime earlier this year I believe. I totally believe both of these couples can make it together and are perfect for each other - however, I can't comprehend knowing someone for such a short amount of time in the intimate way you get to know your significant other - and then being at the point where you are ready to say "Yes...you are the one I can be with the rest of my life."

I can say that now - after almost 3 years of spending time with the man in my life - I would probably say yes if he asked me or if we had "the talk" about going through with it. After 6 months...I wasn't there...after 1.5 years - nope....even after 2.5 - eh, maybe. Anyway, this isn't really going anywhere. I do want to wish my friends who are recently engaged much happiness and peace in their new joint lives and I'm not saying I don't think they will be happy after knowing each other for such a short time - I just wanted to spout out my little thoughts. :-) And that is all for now.

Organize my life please?

I'm a fairly busy person. I don't know how I manager to remember to do anything - I am a LITTLE organized but not nearly enough for all of the things I do. Ideally I would have a folder with information from each portion of my life.

I bought a house in January 2010. I don't believe I officially moved in until March 2010 due to "busy season". I barely got settled in when I had knee surgery. I had completely torn my ACL and had partial tears in both my medial and lateral meniscus. The doctor put in a new ACL and was able to repair my lateral meniscus - however, my medial meniscus was beyond repair so he just shaved what he could and that's that. I was off work for a whole month as I was unable to put weight on my right leg - the physical therapy has been two times a week since then! That takes up a lot of my time.

I have officially started studying to retake the CPA exam again after my last review. I was thinking I didn't really want to but in discussion with my manager and partner I decided it may be worth it for now. I don't believe I will take it again if I don't pass this time though and that has caused me to be more serious in my studying. My favorite coffee shop: Bunna Coffee has recently extended it's hours during the week - which works out for my studies as well :-)

Work has recently really started to push us marketing the firm outside of work. I feel that I'll do okay with this task since I usually go to happy hours and my other groups - plus fundraising gets me points as well and I do a lot of that with the Breast Cancer 3 Day!

I also have recently committed to a year or once a week meetings with a homeless family, where me and a group of others who each have a position to fill at the table mentor the family in what decisions they should be considering to help get them out of their current situation. Check out the program - I feel it could be life changing for not only myself but for many families involved in the table. www.theopentable.org

Church has started becoming important in my life again as well. The young adults group - Kairos - at Grace Community Church has proven to be a good stepping stone in my life. I have made some decent friends there and have learned and gotten motivated to start reading the bible again. I joined a bible study with some people in the group and we are currently studying the book of James. I hope to continue being diligent in my studies and at the very least commit to attending a bible study small group. There is a Financial Peace University starting at the end of August on Wednesday nights that I want to attend as well. I think it would be smart to get real with myself about becoming debt free as soon as possible so I can start saving towards my future, towards schooling for either Aubrey or maybe my own child, and toward missions trips - which I have felt pulled to start doing one day in the future when it is possible to take off of work for such things. I also want to be debt free so more of my money can go toward giving freely to the organizations I truly believe in. (one example being Outreach International). I want to also start becoming more aware myself and bringing more awareness to others about poverty around the world. Outreach International has some great ideas - such as a bean and rice meal (which I fully intend to try to hold one of these within the next year).

Also, due to my reading the Grace Community Church newsletter - I have gained an interest in the International Student's Inc. program. They have something called "Friendship Partners". Friendship Partners are individuals (or families) who build friendships with international students from surrounding colleges by going to monthly events with them. I am going to a training session Aug. 15 and will hopefully get involved in this. I think it is a great opportunity for me to meet someone new who has different perspectives and get to know about their culture as well as show them ours. I am excited to see what this program has to offer me.

Other than that - life is life. I have been loving watching my baby Jasper grow up! I honestly have no idea how I could love any other dog as much as I love him - so unfair to other dogs...he has such a personality and is his own dog. He is just so loving and playful and definitely the cutest dog around! He also keeps me from being a homebody - I have to take him to the park which is good for me.

Sherwey and I have been dating for about 2.5 years now. I can't figure out why he has put up with me for so long...I have issues ha. He takes good care of me and Jasper though and life would be way hard without his help! I love him lots and appreciate the time I've gotten to be with him and his patience with me and all of my little random quirks.

Anyway - the whole point of this blog post is - yes I am involved in a lot right now...but I also am very blessed and things have gone very well over the past few years since I've moved out here to Arizona. Organization? Eh - maybe one day it will come...I wish I had a clone to do the mundane organization....and the everyday life things (like getting my work completed....doing the dishes...making the bed...shopping for clothes that aren't worn out....etc) - but things always seem to work out and that's all I can ask for. God is good.

Peace.

Something new.

I have decided to do something different this year. I am collecting names of those you donate in honor of, in memory of, in support of -- and I will place each name on their own ribbon and attach it to my t-shirt the first day (the first 20 miles) to recognize them. Please feel free to send me names - I truly wish that there were no names...but we all know that is not the case. Even if you can't donate monetarily - please feel free to send me names. I walk in honor of all!

The 3 Day - How you can help me...

Below is my 3 day donation website. I need to earn $2,300 to walk 60 miles over 3 days in the fight against breast cancer!

I completed the walk in 2008 and took a year off to give all of my friends and family a "donation break" but I am back at it again. This year I plan to join a team as well! Check out the Ta-Ta Sisterhood's blog for more information on my team!

This years walk will also be a challenging one as I have just had ACL and meniscus repair surgery exactly 3 weeks ago today. I have not been able to put any weight on my right leg and will be on crutches through next week. Then it will be a matter of building my leg back up enough to walk every single step of the 60 miles beside those who have beaten cancer, those who have not yet beaten cancer, and those who represent their loved ones who were taken from us prematurely due to the horrible disease!

If you'd like to go to my personal site directly...click HERE!

Jasper is awesome.

As most of you know, I have a dog. I didn't think I was a dog person...but Jasper is changing all of that. He is the best dog in the world.

One of the things he enjoys doing is hiding out under beds - and every now and then if he is in a playful mood he plays what I like to call "Hungry Hungry Hippo". Here's a video of us playing :) ENJOY!




Now, I realize some of you may not have the slightest idea what Hungry Hungry Hippos is...so i thought I would help you out. Here's the commercial from the 80's game:

Love.

This past weekend was spent in community with 12 others in a cabin in Pinetop, Arizona. It was absolutely beautiful weather and absolutely beautiful communion. With the current condition of my knee (almost 3 weeks out of surgery for my ACL and meniscus repair), I had a lot of time to sit and view the others as they interacted with one another. If only the love I saw coming from each of them for each other could multiply exponentially to the entire world! I saw people sitting and discussing important issues with one another - not only giving their own opinions, but also actively listening to the other person's thoughts/concerns. We not only grew in knowledge of one another but we formed bonds of trust and love.

Yesterday morning was the final "bible study" which was an extension of the theme started at the bible study Saturday morning. "Love".

Twelve of us sat around picnic tables outside of the cabin - one in the Spirit - and read scripture. The first scripture brought up was 1 John 4:7-12.


"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he so loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."

Also stated was Romans 5:6-8.


"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."


Love is one of the greatest gifts we have been given and as such, we as Christians should be walking pictures of what Christ's love is. Through our discipleship with Christ and our serving of our Brothers and Sisters (not meaning only other Christians...meaning....EVERYONE) we can truly learn to love. Perfect love is not attainable in our current states - I do believe however that it is something we can each work towards and will be achieved in our eternal life through Christ.

To end our bible study yesterday, the teacher had prepared us for taking communion together that we may truly remember the love Christ had for us. Many times we as Christians seem to go about our daily lives and will forget - Christ gave us a way to remember his sacrifice and love for us. The 12 of us (yes just like the 12 disciples) tore off bread and drank from the same glass in remembrance of Christ. If I can take but one ounce of the love and oneness in the Spirit that was felt in those moments out into the world, I believe so many lives could be changed. I pray that God helps me to pass it along to others without judgement, without fear and that somehow even just one person's life could be changed as a result.

In ending - here are lyrics for the day:

THE FACE OF LOVE

by Sanctus Real

I’ve seen your face on stained glass, in colored lights

In pictures of you looking to the sky

You’ve been portrayed a thousand different ways

But my heart can see you better than my eyes

‘Cause it’s love that points the portrait of your life

The face of love

The face of love

You look more like love everyday

I’ve read your words in the pages of your life

And I’ve imagined what you were like

I may not know the shape of your face

But I can feel your heart changing mine

And your love still proves that you’re alive

The face of love

The face of love

You look more like love everyday

You are the face that changed the whole world

No one too lost for your love

No one too low for you to serve

So give us the grace to change the world

No one too lost for me to love

No one too low for me to serve

Let us see....

Let us be your face

Camp Ziyoca 2010

Well, it has been a while since I've posted a blog update so here we go. I figured camp was the appropriate topic for right now - I can't believe it is already only a month and a half away! I'm such a horrible camp director! So far I have a few committed counselors yet many many spots to fill as far as activity planning wise. I hope to get more commitment now that we are down to the wire.

I recently found out that my main campfire leader/talent show organizer/P.R.U.N.E. Radio organizer may not be there this year. If he isn't there - that also means that his fiancé will be missing as well which means I also need to fill the Banquet organizer spot! Ugh! I would step up and help with some of this but I really have very little creative bones in my body and they would not turn out that great at all. There's also the problem that we can never get a camp nurse and that is definitely a requirement from World Headquarters - double ugh!

All will work out in the end. I realize what I really need to sit myself down and do is have a little heart to heart with God and see the true direction he wants to lead us down. Facts are facts - camps have been getting smaller...we have been losing money as our budget is never hit...we just can't keep going like this. It is hard as a director because camp costs keep going up as the campground fees increase and we get fewer campers each year and I KNOW this is financially difficult on many of the campers' families and therefore some can't come. I want us to start growing again. When I was younger our camp was so strong and vibrant and over the years it just started to dwindle. It seems like everyone is getting busy over the summer and moving out of the district and their kids aren't coming to camp due to these facts. I just wish I could get us all together and remind everyone of the spirit of the camp and how God truly does bless everyone who meets on the mountain.

This year's theme is B.O.O.T Camp (Building on our traditions) as I would really like to focus on the traditions we have at camp as well as the traditions of the campgrounds and on a higher level, the traditions of the Church. It is imperative that we educate our youth and let them in on all that has been special to those of us who have grown up at the campgrounds in order for them to stay alive.

Anyway, that is my rambling thus far about camp. I love it - my favorite week of every year. I cannot wait to see all the campers gathering in June and I can't wait to meet with the counselors that I have become so close with. I pray that God helps us make this one week out of the year the most special/spirit-filled week for each and every camper and that the Spirit we send them off with at the end of the week is contagious and they can remember that feeling for a whole year until they come back in 2011 WITH all of their friends.

I will end with the lyrics of my favorite campfire song:

Pass It On

words by Kurt Kaiser

It only takes a spark to get a fire going, And soon all those around can warm up in its glowing; That's how it is with God's Love, Once you've experienced it, You spread the love to everyone You want to pass it on. What a wondrous time is spring, When all the tress are budding The birds begin to sing, the flowers start their blooming; That's how it is with God's love, Once you've experienced it. You want to sing, it's fresh like spring, You want to pass it on. I wish for you my friend This happiness that I've found; You can depend on God It matters not where you're bound, I'll shout it from the mountain top - PRAISE GOD! I want the world to know The Lord of love has come to me I want to pass it on. I'll shout it from the mountain top - PRAISE GOD! I want the world to know The Lord of love has come to me I want to pass it on.