Hard to Believe...

As I get older - one thing always remains consistent...the year flies by MUCH faster. I seriously feel like it was just the other day that I was buying my house when in reality it was January. "Busy Season" was just the other day as well and here I am looking at it in the face again.  I do however hope that April 15th gets here extremely fast this year - -  after that the year has my permission to slow down to a normal speed such as the speed it was when I was a kid. It always felt like SOOO long before my next birthday would happen....SOOO long before Christmas would get here again.

I wonder what makes time go by so slow when we are little. I kept myself busy exploring the world outside of the house throughout the year; playing with friends and building forts in the back pasture. I rode my bike constantly down the street and back.  I kept my mind occupied on thoughts about all of the new experiences and explorations I was going on.  True - maybe they aren't thoughts of money issues and relationship issues like we have as adults - but still many thoughts.  Oh to be a child once again.

Here's to 2011. It is hard to believe that 2010 passed by so fast...but at the end of every year we get a chance to look forward and have hope for a better year to come.

This year:

• I want to pay off my car loan and own my car completely.
• I want to find something to love about everyone I come in contact with.
• I want to pass the CPA exam.
• I want to have more intimate dinners with my boyfriend.
• I want to take my dog out for more walks - he deserves them.
• I want to explain my passions in a more coherent way to myself and others.
• I want to determine my personal theme song and dance around crazy to it at least once a week.
• I want to change someone's life for the better.

What do you want to do in 2011? Remember that faith can make the seemingly impossible - possible!

Every time I read this I get chills...so I thought I'd share :)

Never Say it is not God - Hafiz

I taste what you taste. I know the kind of lyrics
your Soul most likes. I know which sounds will become
Resplendent in your mind and bring such pleasure
Your feet will jump and whirl.

When anything touches or enters your body
Never say it is not God, for He is
Just trying to get close.

I have no use for divine patience -- my lips are always
Burning and everywhere. I am running from every corner
Of this world and sky wanting to kiss you;

I am every particle of dust and wheat -- you and I
Are ground from His Own Body. I am rioting at your door;
I am spinning in midair like golden falling leaves
Trying to win your glance.

I am sweetly rolling against your walls and your shores

All night, even though you are asleep. I am singing from
The mouths of animals and birds honoring our
Beloved's promise and need: to let
you know the Truth.


My dear, when anything touches or enters your body
Never say it is not God, for He and I are
Just trying to get close to you.

God and I are rushing
From every corner of existence, needing to say,
"We are yours."

Posts from the past....

So many years ago, I used to have a xanga. I still have it apparently and every 3 or so months something triggers me to wonder if I wrote about the happenings of my life at such and such time so I go to my xanga and see. I found this post just tonight and I remember every word of it and the feeling I put into it. I'm not a great writer...but I remember what this blog actually "felt".

"I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long.
If we're in each others dreams, we can be together all the time."

So Calvin and Hobbs is DEEP shit man. This quote -- has been eating away at me lately. It's how I feel...it's how I think...it's me in a quote. You know how happy you make me? Probably not...but you do know a little because I know I've told you more than I should. I tend to crack little holes from the wall around my heart to let things sneak through...while the wall is still there -- the holes allow you to see it without necessarily giving it to you.

    I only spoke the truth to you because I wanted you to know -- I have no reason to hide it.

"Love like you've never been hurt..."

Umm...YEA RIGHT. I want people to quit using this quote and actually TELL ME how to do it. Is there a secret? Will you teach me the secret handshake to get into the club?


I am writing this down because I remember it....

"...because the more you hold onto...the more you will have to let go eventually."
Have I mentioned how f'ed up the truth is lately? GARR.  When this came out of my mouth last night it was shocking how much it hurt. I love him but have to let him go.